The fasting is over

The week of Idul Fitri, the holiday that marks the ending of the fasting month of Ramadan, is an interesting time in Jakarta. Last year, my family was living in Singapore during the month of September, and I was commuting back and forth between Jakarta and Singapore, so we did not realize the full impact of the Idul Fitri holiday. Jakarta is a different city.


The month of Ramadan is a period of fasting and self-reflection for Muslims. They are unable to eat or drink anything from sunup until sundown. They are also advised to refrain from foul language, impure thoughts and smoking. The fasting is to help them better relate to those less fortunate themselves. Those unable to eat or drink whenever they want. Muslims believe this helps bring them closer to Allah.

Idul Fitri is, literally, the celebration at the end of fasting. In Indonesia, it is also known as Lebaron, and is a national holiday. All Indonesian companies are required to give a bonus equal to one month’s salary, with a minimum amount of $100, to their employees. Lebaron is a time for Muslim families to celebrate together by breaking the fast and praying together as a family. It is also a time for mudik, or the requesting of forgiveness from parents, elders and in-laws for past transgressions.

To accomplish mudik, the roughly eight million transitory inhabitants of Jakarta pulang kampung (return to village). The roads leaving Jakarta to the various villages in the island of Java are clogged. A picture in the local paper provided an aerial view of the mass exodus. What looked like a huge crowd at a rock concert was actually motorcyclists on one of the main highways leaving town. Most of those returning to their villages are the day-laborers, maids, and nannies of the wealthier residents of Jakarta.

The departure of the help compels the wealthier members of Jakarta to seek ‘escape’ in the many hotel resorts in Singapore, Jakarta and Bali. The middle class, who typically have house-staff but cannot afford to escape to a resort, will either continue working or stay home and do the work typically performed by their house staff. Some members of my team have a maid or nanny or both. It’s interesting to hear how upside down their life becomes when the hired help disappears for a week.

For us, this time has proven very quiet and tranquil. With half the city gone, we have encountered very little traffic. We’ve never seen Jakarta like this. It’s eerie, in some respects. Our help, too, has returned to their villages. This has had a larger affect on my wife than me. She now picks up laundry, cleaning and dishes duty and is full-time with the kids during the day.

It has also allowed some touching and humorous stories around the house, both coming courtesy of our four-year-old daughter, and both involving washing dishes. On our first day without the maid, the dishes had already piled up. Without the nanny, the kids were starving for attention. I took baby duty and my wife took dishes duty. Our daughter was caught in the middle and decided to help out mom with the dishes. This was a big event for our daughter – the first time she was helping with the chores. Comfortable she knew how to wash and then dry, my wife moved on to other chores in the kitchen. When our daughter discovered she was washing alone, she turned to my wife and complained: “Hey! You aren’t helping! Who do you think I am, Cinderella?”

The second unforgettable moment occurred yesterday. My wife had just put our son down for his morning nap and our daughter wanted to play with mommy – a rare opportunity to have mom all to herself. Unfortunately, my wife explained, there were dishes to be done and play would have to wait. Disappointed, our daughter sulked away. Heartbroken, my wife rushed to finish the dishes so she could spend some quality alone time with our daughter. A few minutes later, our daughter was back. She was wearing her apron and carrying her step stool, ready to help mom at the sink. I only wish I could have been there to see my wife’s face.

The Idul Fitri holiday is only two days, but the festivities and vacations last a week. On Monday, life will return to normal; so will the traffic. The only thing we don’t know at this point is whether our nanny will return from her village. Her husband has found a job, and wants her to live with her in the village, instead of twelve hours away in Jakarta. Her income as a nanny is not as important now that he has found work. We hope she will return, though have accepted that she likely will not.